Yet Another New Watch

My enormous new watch arrived yesterday, wrapped in no less than six packages and two layers of bubble-wrap. It's meant to be tough and nigh on indestructible, so why is this necessary? It's water-resistant to 200m, and can be dropped off the top of buildings. It could survive a plane crash.

In any case, here it is. This photo is life-size, so I'm having to wear it around my leg to cope with its gigantic size.

With this device, I'll never be lost again. The built in compass will always tell in which direction the north pole is, and surely that's useful information in some way? Err.